And I’m just like “Was he involving in sexual intercourse with another man when you saw him? No? Didn’t think so. Did he tell you he was interested in men? Then how the fuck do you know then?” I don’t behave the way I do because I’m straight, I behave the way I do because of how I was raised, and because of the environments that have surrounded me all my life thus far. The fact that I am sexually and romantically interested in women takes no part in what I wear in the morning, or in how I decide to brush my teeth. So let’s stop acting like there’s a preset of behaviors that go with a sexuality, or gender, etc.
Queer Porn Star Accused of Pedophilia for Breastfeeding Baby
By Diane Anderson-Minshall
Weeks after queer porn star Madison Young had her baby, she created an art exhibit titled “Becoming MILF.” The concept, according to Jezebel.com, was to explore how Young now embodies a contradiction, the dichotomy to end all dichotomies — that of the Madonna and the whore. At the show’s opening, she served up self-made breast-milk shakes and displayed a baby quilt made of burp cloths and porn star panties. Turns out not every feminist porn star agrees. According to Salon.com, a series of sex worker Twitter wars ensued, the controversy tapping into “culture-wide mommy issues.”
Porn star Furry Girl (who is known for her, um, stage name–like features) criticized Young for publicly breast-feeding, tweeting that only “creeps and pedophiles” are interested in seeing a porn star breast-feed and insinuated that exposing her child to such an audience was abusive. Girl called Young a “a revolting person” and dubbed her defenders “baby fetishists” and “pedos.”
Of course Young (née Tina Butcher) is already a well-known feminist porn star, director, author, and the founder of Femina Potens, an ever-evolving, queer and trans nonprofit gallery and performance space in California that the San Francisco Chronicle calls “the most happening art space in the city; a revolution in art and sex.” She’s curated the gallery for years, mixing envelope-pushing women’s sexuality exhibitions and spoken word shows from lesbians like Annie Sprinkle with less kinky feminist projects from literati like Michelle Tea. Young’s shown up on such outlets as IFC and the History Channel and in MSNBC’s Brian Alexander’s book America Unzipped, which has a whole chapter on her art and work.
So what was this controversial display of pedophilia that Furry Girl imagines? According to Salon, Young posed for a black-and-white photograph dressed up like Marilyn Monroe while clutching her daughter to her bare breast, nonchalantly breast-fed on a video, and then announced that she would nurse live and in person at an upcoming event meant to promote “health awareness for our queer, kinky, and sex positive communities.”
At the event itself, Young discussed breast health, while other presenters talked about breast cancer, antiretroviral drugs, and safe sex. “It wasn’t a sex party; it was an adult sex-ed class hosted by sex workers,” writes Salon’s Tracy Clark-Florey.Furry Girl, an actress in vegan porn, tweeted that context is at the root of her argument, though she no longer wants to comment on the debacle. Meanwhile, Young returned to social media in hopes of ending the Twitter mommy sex wars: “The only one sexualizing this image of me breastfeeding is you. Which makes me feel truly disgusted and violated.”
Wow. I think Madison Young’s exhibition sounds really beautiful and confrontational. This criticism of her public breastfeeding is fucked up. People in porn still have boobs that are there for feeding babies, yo. You would think someone who specializes in having body hair would be into the body’s natural processes. Or at least be an understanding feminist.
I often hear the argument that sexuality is a choice. What I don’t really understand is how it’s an argument against QUILTBAG individuals. What I mean by not understanding it is that if sexuality were a choice, I’d be supporting QUILTBAG individuals anyways. It doesn’t hurt anyone, and makes people happy. I support that. I should also go ahead and say I don’t buy sexuality being a choice. I just think it doesn’t really make much sense as an argument.
by Joan Nagel. A great sociologist in the feild of ethnicity and sexuality.
Click the link and enjoy reading the book - jump back and forth between the chapters. (links below!)
Oooooh, very curious to read this!
Make no mistake, I grieve the loss of Meredith Kercher and the horrible way she died. But I have little doubt that if Knox had been a little less pretty, a little less sexual, and a little less American, she’d never have spent a day in prison for her roommate’s murder.
I rejoice in her freedom today.
— Jaclyn Friedman (via rockandrollhigh)
You CAN’T stop kids finding out about sex. You CAN at least make sure some of what they hear is sane and reasonable."
— Steven Moffat (via tinysprout)
A production assistant on a music video shoot I did recently works with children during the week. She said that, for her, the most effective way to get the attention of a group of kids is to stand at the front of the room, loudly say “If you can hear me, touch your nose” and then wait for everyone to have their finger on their nose. She uses this method for large groups of adults, too.
So: If you can read me, touch your nose.
Pornography is entertainment. Pornography is a business. Pornography is not a substitute for sexual education. The scenarios in porn plots are not a guide to dating or picking up partners for casual sex.
I always figured that anyone old enough to be legally viewing pornography would be able to comprehend the difference between entertainment and real life. I forget that we don’t all understand that a movie like Forrest Gump is not the same as a History Channel documentary on the Vietnam War. I also forget that we don’t all understand that a History Channel documentary on the Vietnam War may not be entirely accurate. I forget that even though pornography is made to be entertaining and portray fantasies, there is a large void in practical sexual education that people sometimes attempt to fill with porn.
I want to believe that people use critical thinking skills. I want to believe that people see Brazzers/Manwin’s Get Rubber campaign and the safer sex/condom use speech at the beginning of Vivid’s DVDs. I want to believe that people watch the pre and post scene interviews included in Kink.com’s videos. I really want to believe that people don’t need to see these disclaimers and interviews to understand that what they are watching is done by tested, consenting professionals. Apparently, though, this comprehension is not always the case.
As adult performers, our job is to show up with a clean STI test and act/perform in an adult production to the director’s satisfaction. It isn’t our responsibility to take on the task of educating people about sexual technique or safer sex practices. Our job description does not include worrying about the people who can’t differentiate between what they see on a screen and what is acceptable behavior in real life, the same as it isn’t Bruce Willis’s job to go around reminding people that action movies are super cool but shooting actual people with real guns isn’t, or that calling 911 is a much better tactic than shooting someone full of adrenaline in the event of a heroin overdose. But some of us do…
There are adult performers and sex workers who talk about these things: When Nina Hartley recounts a recreational sexual encounter on her blog, she regularly mentions the use of condoms and gloves. Sometimes she mentions less standard practices, such as having a specific pair of boots for BDSM that don’t touch the ground outside so that they can be licked without concern for what they’ve walked through. Danny Wylde writes frankly about his experiences in sex work and openly discusses his thoughts and emotions. There are countless others who do frank interviews or keep blogs discussing topics relating to sex work, the adult industry, and sex-for-work vs. sex in personal lives. If someone actually wants to know about porn, there’s a wealth of information online from a variety of perspectives.
We just don’t get nearly the amount of traffic or visibility that a major news outlet gets. Our voices need to be louder, because we are talking.
“ugh I hate girls”
“girls are such drama queens”
“she’s such a whore!”
why are we women so friggin mean to each other?
on today’s sex+, i’m talkin about GIRL ON GIRL HATE.
I overheard a conversation, where a friend of mine (who listens to podcasts to improve his already good english) was recommended Dan Savage. I told him that Dan Savage was a bit of a piece of shit, and that I’d find a better podcast that deals with sex/sexuality/gender, etc. Any recommendations?